Going bonkers in Honkers

My blog posts are as scattered this year as my brain has been.

So lets just keep the random theme going a little longer shall we?

I am not sure I finished writing about Perth, one day I will write about my various trips to the Queensland Sunshine Coast, and my recent trip to the UK, but for now as my brain is going to explode with study and I am procrastinating, the going bonkers in Honkers theme seems most fitting ๐Ÿ™‚

So this story takes place in Hong Kong where I may have even been this time last week, or was I in transit – honestly I have no clue!

I flew over to London by myself, so it was nice not only to fly back with my husband, but to break up the loooooong journey from London to Aus with a short 2 day stop over in Hong Kong.

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After staying in a cupboard for a week in London (ok slight exaggeration – but it was a very tiny place) we treated ourselves to a nice hotel in Hong Kong and well the roof top pool was a def selling point for me.

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It can be hard to be adventurous and want to explore a city, after a long flight, especially when you have booked an amazing hotel with a deluxe looking king size bed cruelly taunting you and luring you in to sleep with its soft fluffy cushions.

But what sort of traveller would I be if I caved in that easily!

Half excitedly, half reluctantly we showered got changed, had a sneaky quick swim and then set out to explore the city.

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Lets be honest, when we looked at the map and discovered these gems our excitement was at an all time high.

Sadly we didn’t find this suburb or street, but we did find some equally amusing things…

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I love travelling to find signs that amuse me, order food I have no idea what it is, jump on transport I don’t understand, using currency that is unfamiliar.

It’s an experience and I love every part of it.

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To raise my business profile, I am always trying new yoga poses and taking photos in various locations, as we were racing for our bus, I of course wanted my husband to take a quick photo of me.

This is the scene…

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This is the story…

As I start to get into the pose, I had not considered the large volume of people walking the streets, the lights about to change, our bus about to depart to take us back to our hotel, to the bed we could hear calling us from several miles away.

So back to the pose; as I grab my foot a man appears behind meย you know the back-end where I am wearing a dress, trying to lift my leg without showing him and the rest of Hong Kong my undies.

To the other side of me a man appears trying to sell me a handbag, while the man staring up my dress is saying yeeees nice pose –

My husband is yelling at me to hurry up as he takes the photos and someone is trying to sell him a watch at the same time.

Ah yes travelling, you love it or you hate it – simple as that!

I love it- the more bonkers the better ๐Ÿ™‚

So this particular story ends here, it ends with two weary travelers collapsing into the most deluxe bed, this story ends with the best sleep I had had in a while, it probably snoring and maybe some dribbling…

It ends here and it continues soon, with a bad storm, so bad it was actually the tail end of a typhoon, it continues with a walk around Hong Kong, a man in DT’s and a swim that was not meant to be……

The east met the west then the east ate the entire west!

I can’t believe a month has passed since I went to Perth on a mini adventure, I am now getting ready for another mini adventure yoga retreat, a trip to the UK 2 days later, and I had a beautiful weekend in Noosa in between…..

Life has been crazy, beautiful that’s for sure!

Perth; my memories are of food, of friendships of more food, of drink and food again ๐Ÿ™‚

Are you sensing a theme here?

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There is nothing better than a mini trip with your besties who love food as much as you.

Perth is a foodies paradise, trust me I know! After just five days we tried many places and one very thoroughly as we arrived at this amazing place for breakfast; that turned into more coffee, more bread, extra dips, brunch, then lunch, then wine and cheese.

Don’t judge – it’s holidays ๐Ÿ™‚

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As my budget blew out, so did my waistline. What’s a girl to do, but put on her stretchy pants and get back in there for more.

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Honestly Perth surprised me with its funky cafes, it’s trendy bars, and beautiful people, Perth had it all and more.

Coming from Queensland where we may sook about winter, arriving in Perth where the weather was a little cooler and the seasons actually existed was a beautiful treat for us all.

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Our last day was spent lazing around on a picnic rug in the sun at a beautiful vineyard in the Swan River area. We sampled wine, we ate antipasto platters, we sampled the coffee, we sampled the chocolate.

The simple act of not having to be anywhere at any particular time, to be able to spend quality time with friends, to laugh until your sides hurt, to eat until you need to undo your top button are all the things I can possibly dream of in a mini adventure.

The east meets the west

This time last week I had flown from Brisbane to Perth, a short 5 hour trip from the east to the west side of my ridiculously large country Australia.

In fact this time last week, I was sitting in my friends lounge room, about to visit another friend living over there and getting excited about watching the sun set into the ocean.

My excitement was palpable as the sun made its graceful decent, and us east coast girls used to seeing the sun rise from the ocean commenced what can only be described as a happy interpretive celebratory dance – or something !

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To celebrate the sun shining out of one friends ass we did another crazy jig – don’t judge we are friends from high school away together for the first time in ages – what’s not to celebrate ๐Ÿ™‚

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When you are used to seeing the sun rise over the ocean, seeing it drop into the ocean on the other side of your country is quite an amazing thing.

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As the sun had no buildings, trees or landmarks to obstruct its view, the sun set lasted an eternity.

Afraid to look away and miss a moment we did what any 3 girls traveling (2 with children may I add) would do – we found the nearest bar and drank wine over looking the majestic sunset.

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As I said with no obstructions in its path , the sunset lasted for ages and we couldn’t think of a more perfect start for these three east coast girls traveling and meeting the west…..

Yesterday was a great day

Yesterday I woke at 430 and walked (with thousands of others) to currumbin beach for the Anzac Day dawn service, and watched the most beautiful sunrise.

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Yesterday at 730am I ate cake for breakfast.

At 9am I had my second breakfast cooked for me and ate it with lovely people looking over the broad water.

I shared a sneaky cold beer with my uncle at Tallabudgera Creek.

I swam in my undies and I ran under a sprinkler like a kid.

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Yesterday I had sunset drinks by the Currumbin river.

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Yesterday I felt so free, content, happy and grateful for my life; for the unselfish acts of people I don’t know to allow me this great life, and for the beautiful country I live in.

Yesterday felt like many wonderful adventures in one.

Yesterday my friends, was a great day!

The day Donnie Darko came to town

Have you ever experienced a day so full and so magical and strange you thought your head might explode?

Well I have, recently experienced a few of those, down at the beach at Currumbin.

Early morning walks.

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Fish and …. Fish and fricken nothing that’s what.
The fish and chip place ran out of chips – utter Easter madness and on Good Friday.!

Luckily we were all feeling calm and serene after sunset drinks by the ocean.

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Following a full super moon and an eclipse earlier in the week, it stands to reason there will be a certain amount of craziness in the air.

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In between trying to spell out the letter S unsuccessfully with my body and diving into my friends arms with no warning so she dropped me….

From out of nowhere a shadow looms in the sand dunes.

This was the day Donnie Darko came to town.

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As confusing as it was menacing, the shadow loomed and then was gone and what was left was an Easter message – written on the sands of Palm Beach……..

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And that is the story of my Easter ๐Ÿ™‚

Dreaming of summer

I am sitting outside distracting myself from doing work by wondering how early is too early to have a Friday afternoon beverage, and thinking about an awesome summer just gone.

I do live in the sunshine state and while the weather is still beautiful, and the ocean still warm enough to swim in, I am going to sulk and miss summer anyway so deal with it:)

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I love summer, and everything it stands for, hot salty fun, ok that came out a little dodgierย than intended and no I havent started drinking yet.

But miss it I do!

Salty beach curled hair, sun-kissed skin, drying bikinis, sand all through the house much to my husbands angst, what’s not to love.

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Sure there may be days when you walk down the beach with a friend and Asian tourists think you are someone famous and run down the beach to get their photos taken with them and it happens so many times that you have to say no more and run away from them and say to your friend well that was weird, while she just watches and laughs at you getting so many pictures taken.

Sure sometimes you dive into the ocean with such excited gusto that you surface to find your bikini thought its job was to expose and not cover every part of your body.

Sure you may need to go to the beach so badly that you arrive at your friend’s house two hours late, sandy dripping wet, and while the wife runs in apologising for being late and asks to use their shower the husband bends down to put the bags down and a steady stream of water cascades from his nose.

Summer brings a certain sense of excitement, you can feel it in the air, its infectious and its beautiful, its one of my favourite feelings being the solar charged being that I am.

Summer till we meet again, I will be thinking of you and dreaming of you and while I may flirt a little with Autumn and Spring, you are my one true love – Don’t ever forget that!

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3 hours in Kuta; a van full of midgets and the first shoe sale of the day

It’s been a few months now since going to Bali, and life has been hectic in a good way. Not in a ‘midget fun boxing’ hectic way but in a frantic throwing myself into life type-way.

We will get back to the midget fun boxing later, lets set the scene a little more first!

So my memories of our peaceful time in Ubud are as distant as the location itself, as I said life has been moving at a rapid pace similar to that of Kuta.

Kuta is busy, it is hectic, it is crude and it was stinking hot. Less than 5 minutes after arriving we craved the solitude of our previous place, we missed the refreshing breezes and the slower gentle pace to which we had been accustomed.

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That’s me sulking!

Two seconds after stepping foot onto the beach we were hassled by people coming from us at all angles trying to sell us one of everything.

Don’t get me wrong, Kuta can be a great, fun place to be, but it can also feel like you want to shrink into the background and pretend you are not Australian when you view so many of the drunken, shirtless, bogan Aussies being
grose.

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This is my husband who is not an Aussie or a bogan ๐Ÿ™‚

It is a challenging experience trying to be patient and saying no to the endless stream of pushy sales people trying to make a living, this is their living after all. This is their culture and their way, yet even knowing this all it can be exhausting politely smiling and saying no every second down every street you turn.

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We found a moment of solitude, a coffee and a respite from the heat, and decided to make the most of our now two hours in Kuta.

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Me and my big hair! Darn overseas humidity, my traveling nemesis!

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So caffeinated, momentarily cooled and calm off we set in search of a bargain, where we purchased a pair of shoes each and received a discount for being the first sale of the day – apparently it’s lucky!

You call that lucky – try finding these hidden gems at the front of the store.

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We didn’t buy them but I was pretty excited when the man let me take that winning photo.

We walked out of the shop, and couldn’t believe our luck when a van with the sign “midget fun boxing” began to approach.

As I scrambled for my camera my husband stood nearby, saying something to me, that I couldn’t hear over my excitement to capture yet another winning shot!

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Two seconds after capturing this, things were being thrown at me from the van. What I honestly didn’t realize was the van was filled with the midget fun boxers, I was shooting into the sun and truly didn’t see them, the first I realized they were there was when a van full of midgets were throwing things at me.

Now that’s an experience I never expected in my three hours in Kuta.

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At least someone still cared – the pub cares for you pub was open but this ordeal had made me hungry so we set out for some bloody fckin cold beer and found that and much much more …..

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You will need to zoom in close to ensure you capture everything that this sign above has to offer.

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Two and a half hours of walking the streets of Kuta had left my feet like that, so the last half an hour was spent washing my feet like this ….

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Rice terraces, rashes and random boob massages!

So I left you all at monkey forest where luckily I didn’t have my period as monkeys much like men do not like a woman on her period.

Every morning we have woken up to a beautiful sunny day, and while a friendly man cooks us an omelette and I contemplate eating the corn ‘plakes’ I instead always choose the delicious banana pancakes and fruit and look out at this view, could anyone ever tire of this.

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Funny Signs have always been a favorite of mine when travelling, and sorry guys to get back to the period but seriously how hilarious is this?

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So today was spent visiting a temple where we ensured we did not throw our coint into the pond.

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All jokes aside, this was an unexpected and beautiful experience, visiting the Holy Spring Water Temple, where people travel to cleanse their soul when they feel they their soul had become dark.

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So at the risk of jumping all over the place with this post (ah who am I kidding its how I write – especially on holiday) let’s go back to the title where yesterday we had (yet another) massage, in the most idyllic of places…..

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…. One minute i was relaxed, then all of a sudden my masseuse told me to turn over, she yanked down my sarong leaving me exposed in my black paper “panties” and proceeded to massage my boobs…..

As I lay there surprised I wondered if my husband was getting his own “special” version at the bed next to me. Being the great wife that I am, I kept my eyes closed, and chanted to myself – ignorance is bliss, ignorance is bliss!

So after getting a massage a day, I can inform you that only one included an added extra boob rub.

Today we went to see a volcano and the beautiful rice terraces, and we were blown away by the beauty of Ubud.

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So the rash, for a girl who loves the sun and heat so much it seems ridiculous that she would develop heat rash, but she did.

At least she hopes that is what it is, only time will tell she supposes- why she is referring to herself in third person you ask – well when you talk about a rash it just seems like the thing to do.

Away from the rash that covers my legs, stomach and back, and back to the travels, Ubud is incredible, even with its wooden penis bottle openers, door handles and statues…..

…..the beautiful simple elegant restaurants, bars and cafes….

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….the rice fields and sheer natural beauty of the area.

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We are now in Kuta, missing Ubud, the smiling friendly people, the quiet beauty.

It’s bloody hard to find a taxi in Bali

-I started this post a few days ago I think!? that’s the thing about travelling; hours can feel like seconds, days like weeks, time has the ability to both fly by and stand still –

Yesterday was spent walking for miles, with no fixed destination on a journey of discovery and adventure.

As always I was not disappointed by taking those side hidden streets, where tourists avoid and the real country is revealed.

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Anyone who has ever been to Bali will know the title of this post is utter bollocks. When in reality every 4-5 metres stands another guy holding a taxi sign – saying taxi – no sir ok how about tomorrow…..

You either choose to get annoyed, or you smile politely and move on, again and again and again.

On our journey we found a young girl wielding a knife, guys welding with no safety clothing, school kids riding motorbikes, roundabouts made of a pile of rocks in the centre of an intersection dogs lying in the middle of the road, the most amazing food in both taste and price, and massages so cheap it would be a crime not to have one every day.

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On our journey I once again fell in love with Bali, the beautiful people, the beautiful scenery, the ridiculous juxtaposition of chaos and serenity.

On our journey I remembered my distrust for those seemingly cute monkeys, as one second after arriving into the monkey forest, I put my phone down for half a second and a monkey came running over to steal it or take family portraits I will never know as my lightening fast reflexes ensured I got to my camera first.

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So as I finish this I laze on a couch it is day 3 I think and I am not sure if I just have explained day 1 or day 2 but I am happy, I am in Bali and I am doing what I love traveling and exploring.

The sounds of nature

Yesterday I awoke after only a few hours sleep, falling asleep to the sounds of torrential rain. I would be lying if I didn’t say the sound of rain in the morning made a tiny bit sad.

My sadness quickly turned to excitement as light starting pouring through the windows I viewed from my 4 pillar Balinese bed.

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I leapt out of bed, threw back the curtains and stared in disbelief, my heart caught in its chest for behind the curtains is my view for the next few days; a few that is made up of a lush dense jungle, the sound of rain is actually running rapids running below.

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If this was outside my window, what else would be outside my door.

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In true Balinese style lighting is kept to a minimum, so as we arrived at 1am this morning, everything was shrouded in darkness.

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Our first night was spent running around the room, shrieking with delight then promptly collapsing in our large and ridiculously comfortable bed.

As my husband sensibly kept sleeping in the morning, that’s not how I roll, so after just a few hours sleep, my heart was beating against my chest, the thought of waiting to explore our hotel until he woke was clearly not an option.

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As I set out of my hotel room, I was greeted by a smiling Balinese man (not right outside my door – that would be a little creepy) as I explored further I realized the only sounds I could hear were nature and the beating of my heart.

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Everywhere I turned more beauty surrounded me threatening to wrap me in its arms so tightly I may burst.

Balinese men walk around laying pink hibiscus plants on the pathways and stone statues.

When I discovered a cave with hot natural springs, a spa and sauna surrounded by statues and beautiful fresh flowers I almost exploded.

I ran back to our room, trying to “accidentally” make as much noise as I could to wake my husband up, but as he continued to sleep I sat on my verandah, with my coffee and my book.

Not a bad way to pass the time.

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While squirrels run in the trees, weird animals make weird noises, and phallic things hang in trees.

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I felt like I was caught up in a beautiful bizarre dream, and this was just the beginning.